What is it like having an ADHDer at home? Unlocking ADHD writer Lilian Hoe shares her daily experiences.
No one wants to be a mess or live in a messy home. Individual preferences and personality traits influence how we organise and live. Add to that the complexity of ADHD attributes, maintaining a liveable home takes a little creativity and planning. Instead of battling to keep a tight ship, devise ways to make your household a sanctuary for all.
Distress and anxiety are uncomfortable feelings, and we have all felt them when we cannot locate an item or are at a loss at what to do. The keyword for living with ADHDers is “order” – it does not come naturally but can be orchestrated.
Whether you live alone or with others, here are three simple hacks:
- Give it a place. Giving things a place creates a semblance of order. A shelf for books, a corner for toys and a box for crafts categorises loose items and minimises the risk of misplacing things. Granted, the corner may look a mess, but you know where to find the toys.
- Set a time. The concept of time can be lost when in a state of hyperfocus or when the mind is darting from one event to another. Declare mealtimes and announce chores to be completed. While meals may not start on time and chores may take longer than usual to get done, making it time bound helps to direct focus to the task at-hand.
- Make it visible. ‘Out of sight, out of mind’, as the adage goes. Keep things such as keys and mobile phones in sight. Placing car keys and house keys near the door minimise the chance of leaving them behind when going out.
Finally, make it rewarding. Remember the dopamine effects when we are rewarded? Habits need time to form. Be patient if your set-up does not work at first. Be generous with reminders and encouragement, and be earnest to affirm and acknowledge when you spot desired behaviours.
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